NSFW The corrupted wish game, NSFW allowed

Granted, but there was a bit of an error on the order and you got yourself a cruise missile instead. Enjoy terrifying your neighbours.

I wish to be even more Autistic. o3o
Granted, but now you see dead people

I wish I knew more than one language
 
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Granted but there are tons of empty glasses next to it, forcing you to awkwardly sip on each glass in order to find the one with the camouflaged chameleon milk.

I wish Karma Chameleon was no longer stuck in my head ;w;
 
I wish Karma Chameleon was no longer stuck in my head ;w;
Granted. The KARMA CHAMELEON is now loose, watch out :O

I wish the animal control got here soon before the KARMA CHAMELEON makes a mess of the place :O
 
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Don't worry Meta, I've heard it comes and goes, it comes and gooooooooohooees



Granted, but the only dinos are tiny Oculudentavis, which are roughly the size of a bee hummingbird.

I wish I could have a pet spider.
Granted, but it lives inside your maw

I wish I could swim in the ocesn
 
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I wish I could float

Granted! <your ears are now pierced and several large balloons have been attached to the loops, pulling gently on you as you start to rise higher...>

I wish I was being massaged on a beach spa somewhere nice.
 
Granted, but every time you fly something goes wrong and you have to make an emergency landing on roadways in the middle of goddamn nowhere (aka my parents place, lol)

I wish I could live anywhere I want without worrying about housing
 
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Granted, but your parents do and keep constantly calling you and asking how you're holding up in the place you're currently at.

I wish I could write like Shakespeare
 
<cough> umm... don't you? Granted, but they smell like skunk butt

I wish I could go skiing right now
 
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